Nekkid, Drunk Woman Rampages After Boyfriend Refuses To Put Out - http://bit.ly/1eu4dzj

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Nekkid, Drunk Woman Rampages After Boyfriend Refuses To Put Out

Glendale, AZ — A 24-year-old woman is facing several charges after allegedly pitching a fit and breaking stuff, and slightly injuring her infant, after her boyfriend refused to give her the D.

This may come as a surprise to none of you, but this isn’t the first time we’ve covered such a story. We got a beatin‘, a fish-hookin‘ and a dick bitin‘… just to name a few. Will you men never learn?

Anyway, police were called to the couple’s home Monday and found Ashley Marie Prenovost nekkid, bloody and drunk. It  is alleged that after the boyfriend refused coitus, Prenovost went on a rampage. Police say she punched a couple of holes in the bedroom wall and smashed a picture frame, causing injuries to both of her hands.

Then, for whatever reason, Prenovost picked up the four-month-old child she shares with her boyfriend, and began carrying her around the house, yelling and screaming and bleeding all over the place. At some point during the alleged tirade, the child’s head met a dresser. I’m assuming the injury wasn’t very significant.

Prenovost was arrested on suspicion of child and adult abuse, aggressive assault on a minor, endangerment, assault with intent to injure, criminal damage and disorderly conduct. She has since been released on a personal recognizance bond.

Cornered By Mom, Naked Woman Jumps From 15-Year-Old Boy’s Window, Breaks Ankle - http://bit.ly/1eu3z4T

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Cornered By Mom, Naked Woman Jumps From 15-Year-Old Boy’s Window, Breaks Ankle

Manara, AZ — A 34-year-old woman was left with a broken ankle and a criminal record after allegedly jumping from the second-floor window of a 15-year-old boy after his mother caught her nekkid ass in his bedroom.

At about 2:00 a.m. on January 21, the boy’s mother heard some sort of knocking sound coming from his bedroom. When she attempted to investigate, she found the door was locked. The kid must have realized mom wasn’t leaving anytime soon and eventually allowed her into the bedroom. It was then, police say, that she spotted a naked female crouching on the floor near her son’s bed.

Mom demanded the woman leave the premises, and after the woman collected her clothing, she complied…. right out the window. After what I assume was a hard landing, the woman limped off down the street.

About 30 minutes later, the woman returned to the home and informed the boy’s mother that she had broken her ankle. Mom then realized the woman that had shagged her son was a family acquaintance … an acquaintance she had previously warned to stay away from her son after she was caught flirting with him.

The boy later told police the woman, identified as Keri Gonzalez, had snuck into the home after his mom fell asleep and had a few drinks with him before doing him a couple times.

Gonzalez has since been charged with sexual misconduct with a minor and providing false information to police.

Teen Charged With Beating His Adoptive Mother To Death With Dumbbell - http://bit.ly/1eRUnMe

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Teen Charged With Beating His Adoptive Mother To Death With Dumbbell

EVERETT, WA — Brad George, 16, has been charged with murder after he confessed to beating his adoptive mother to death with a dumbbell.

Two weeks after getting off probation for assaulting a staff member at a school for troubled youth, George murdered 37 -year-old Georgina Latshaw, the woman who has taken care of him for the last ten years.

George called 911 on Friday afternoon after coming home from school to find his mother’s car at home, although she should have been at work, and the front door of his family’s apartment open. When he could not get his mother to answer his cell phone, he called for police.

When arriving officers entered the apartment, they found Latshaw dead in her bed. She had apparent blunt-force trauma to the head, and a bloody dumbbell was found in a nearby garbage can. Robbery did not seem to be a motive as there were no signs of forced entry, and money was reportedly lying out in the open in George’s room.

Later that same day, George went on television with his two sisters to express their disbelief that anyone would want to harm their mother.

Turns out this isn’t the first time George has been featured on the news. Back in 2010, when he was only 12, he was the focus of a search after he ran away from home. That’s when Latshaw explained the boy suffered from mental illness and that she had been raising George and his sister since he was 17-months-old.

After George was located, he was treated at a local hospital for mental health issues and threats of violence. He was diagnosed with a cornucopia of mental health issues, including having homicidal thoughts and “extreme hallucinations envisioning his mother as a short clown with a blood-filled mouth.” He also reportedly made a clay sculpture of Latshaw with a severed head.

During one of these evaluations, George went full Micheal Myers and became non-responsive before pulling a wooden arm from a chair and threatened to use it against a female nurse. She screamed and two security guards were able to disarm him.

He would be on the news again a year later, at the age of 13, after he ran away from a Seattle center that cares for patients facing mental health issues. Last year, George punched a wall, kicked a locker and went after a staff member at Bellevue’s Overlake Specialty School for troubled youth. He would plead guilty to fourth-degree assault and get six months probation, which just ended two weeks ago.

Latshaw’s family and friends told detectives that George had threatened his mother before, including once with a knife, possibly explaining why Latshaw used a security bar on her bedroom door.

When George was interviewed on Sunday, he finally admitted to murdering Latshaw. He told them he’d quit taking his medications a week earlier, and that he had come to the conclusion that Latshaw was poisoning him with bleach.

So late Thursday night or early Friday morning, after George says he tried clearing his head of negative thoughts, he used a coathanger to disable the security bar his mother had put in place. He then entered her room, stood over her for 15 seconds, then bashed her head in with a dumbbell. He then cleaned up and tried to stage a robbery by removing several items from the home and tossing them around the neighborhood.

George was taken into custody and is being held on $500,000 bail. Prosecutors have until today to charge him with murder.  If they do, George will be tried as an adult.

Teen Charged With Beating His Adoptive Mother To Death With Dumbbell - http://bit.ly/1eRUnMe

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Teen Charged With Beating His Adoptive Mother To Death With Dumbbell

EVERETT, WA — Brad George, 16, has been charged with murder after he confessed to beating his adoptive mother to death with a dumbbell.

Two weeks after getting off probation for assaulting a staff member at a school for troubled youth, George murdered 37 -year-old Georgina Latshaw, the woman who has taken care of him for the last ten years.

George called 911 on Friday afternoon after coming home from school to find his mother’s car at home, although she should have been at work, and the front door of his family’s apartment open. When he could not get his mother to answer his cell phone, he called for police.

When arriving officers entered the apartment, they found Latshaw dead in her bed. She had apparent blunt-force trauma to the head, and a bloody dumbbell was found in a nearby garbage can. Robbery did not seem to be a motive as there were no signs of forced entry, and money was reportedly lying out in the open in George’s room.

Later that same day, George went on television with his two sisters to express their disbelief that anyone would want to harm their mother.

Turns out this isn’t the first time George has been featured on the news. Back in 2010, when he was only 12, he was the focus of a search after he ran away from home. That’s when Latshaw explained the boy suffered from mental illness and that she had been raising George and his sister since he was 17-months-old.

After George was located, he was treated at a local hospital for mental health issues and threats of violence. He was diagnosed with a cornucopia of mental health issues, including having homicidal thoughts and “extreme hallucinations envisioning his mother as a short clown with a blood-filled mouth.” He also reportedly made a clay sculpture of Latshaw with a severed head.

During one of these evaluations, George went full Micheal Myers and became non-responsive before pulling a wooden arm from a chair and threatened to use it against a female nurse. She screamed and two security guards were able to disarm him.

He would be on the news again a year later, at the age of 13, after he ran away from a Seattle center that cares for patients facing mental health issues. Last year, George punched a wall, kicked a locker and went after a staff member at Bellevue’s Overlake Specialty School for troubled youth. He would plead guilty to fourth-degree assault and get six months probation, which just ended two weeks ago.

Latshaw’s family and friends told detectives that George had threatened his mother before, including once with a knife, possibly explaining why Latshaw used a security bar on her bedroom door.

When George was interviewed on Sunday, he finally admitted to murdering Latshaw. He told them he’d quit taking his medications a week earlier, and that he had come to the conclusion that Latshaw was poisoning him with bleach.

So late Thursday night or early Friday morning, after George says he tried clearing his head of negative thoughts, he used a coathanger to disable the security bar his mother had put in place. He then entered her room, stood over her for 15 seconds, then bashed her head in with a dumbbell. He then cleaned up and tried to stage a robbery by removing several items from the home and tossing them around the neighborhood.

George was taken into custody and is being held on $500,000 bail. Prosecutors have until today to charge him with murder.  If they do, George will be tried as an adult.

Two Teens Accused Of Raping, Murdering Corriann Cervantes During Satanic Ritual - http://bit.ly/1m2Y6fE

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Two Teens Accused Of Raping, Murdering Corriann Cervantes During Satanic Ritual

HOUSTON, TX – Police have arrested two teens, 17-year-old Jose Reyes and a 16-year-old classmate, in connection to the abduction, rape and murder of 15-year-old Corriann Cervantes.

Corriann Cervantes was last seen on Wednesday, but her body wasn’t found until early Saturday morning after someone went to investigate an open door at a vacant apartment. Houston police say the girl had been violently raped and then had her head bashed in with a toilet tank lid and an ashtray.

Even more disturbing is the fact that there was evidence of occult activity in the apartment and around the girl’s half-naked body. According to investigators, an upside-down cross had been carved into Cervantes’ stomach, and religious items had been placed around her body.

Reyes was arrested on Sunday after confessing to his part in the crime to a family member. He told police that he his 16-year-old friend both knew Cervantes from the alternative school they all attended. He said that they took the girl to the abandoned apartment where they both raped her before beating her to death when she tried to leave.

According to police, Reyes said the motive behind the crime was so the 16-year-old “could sell his soul to the devil.”

Reyes is looking at a charge of capital murder, and has been ordered held in jail without bail. The 16-year-old was arrested on Monday at school, then referred to the Harris County Juvenile Probation Authority on a charge of capitol murder.

Reyes seems to be taking everything in stride, even smiling for the cameras while in court on Monday.

Father Accused Of Threatening To Shoot 9-Year-Old Daughter For Stepping On Dog’s Tail - http://bit.ly/NufbQv

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Father Accused Of Threatening To Shoot 9-Year-Old Daughter For Stepping On Dog’s Tail

Cleveland, OH — The totally sane lookin’ fella to the right is Daniel Roman — police say he aimed a gun at his 9-year-old daughter and threatened to pull the trigger last month after the girl stepped on his dog’s tail.

The child, along with her siblings, were apparently visiting Roman for the weekend when the alleged incident occurred. It is unclear whether the child was purposely mistreating the dog, but according to police, Roman threatened her with, “Step on the dog’s tail again, and I will pull the trigger.”

Roman’s grandmother, who claims to have been at the home that particular weekend, told 19 Action News that her grandson did not make any threats towards the child. Police say, however, Roman also threatened his younger children, 7-year-old twins, with bodily harm if they breathed a word to anyone.

The children’s stepfather, when contacted by 19 Action News, had this to say to a reporter:

“He called us denying it so I knew there had to be some truth in it. Cause why would he call us if we didn’t ask him any questions?”

Roman has been charged with menacing, child endangering and domestic violence.

Woman Shoots McDonald’s After Employees Get Her Orders Wrong - http://bit.ly/1bFdTay

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Woman Shoots McDonald’s After Employees Get Her Orders Wrong

Grand Rapids, MI — A 29-year-old woman is facing charges after allegedly poppin’ a cap in a McDonald’s drive thru window’s ass because the employees got her order wrong. Twice.

Shaneka Torres and an unidentified female placed their order at the drive thru early this morning, only to find out at the window that the employees had somehow screwed it up. I’m assuming a heated verbal altercation followed, because McDonald’s, and the two women were promised that their next meal would be free.

Police say the same two women visited the restaurant again at about 3:00 that same morning and placed another order. Again, the order was wrong. This time, though, the verbal altercation was escalated with a gun.

Police allege Torres reached over the driver of the vehicle and fired a bullet through the drive thru window before driving off. Fortunately, the bullet didn’t actually hit anyone, it just kinda exited through the other side of the building. Employees were pretty much clueless they had been fired upon — they thought a coffee pot exploded.

Torres might have gotten away with it… if she hadn’t left her cellphone number during the first incident so the manager could call and discuss the fucked up order. Derp.

Mom Arrested for Allowing Her Daughters’ Molester To Move Into Their Home - http://bit.ly/1jk1FMc

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Mom Arrested for Allowing Her Daughters’ Molester To Move Into Their Home

Jonesboro, GA — Darrika Driver, 31, was taken into custody earlier this week for allowing her boyfriend, a man convicted for molesting her two daughters, to move back into her home. And if that isn’t shitty enough, police allege that upon his release from prison, the fucker molested Driver’s 14-year-old daughter, AGAIN, and captured the act on his cellphone.

Though it’s unclear at this point how long 22-year-old Natavious Mays was jailed for initially molesting the two girls, it’s painfully obvious that it wasn’t long enough.

Mays, who was on probation, was not on the property when authorities visited Driver to inquire about his whereabouts. Driver reportedly lied to police, claiming she had no idea where Mays lived. Bullshit was called. When the police returned to the woman’s home, they learned the two had beat feet and disappeared. Fortunately, their freedom was short-lived…. cops caught up with them a few days later and placed both under arrest.

Driver is being held without bond, charged with child cruelty and harboring a sex offender. Mays is facing charges of aggravated child molestation, production of child pornography and failure to register as a sex offender.

Man, 28, Accused Of Impregnating 13-Year-Old Autistic Girl - http://bit.ly/1fCzWAU

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Man, 28, Accused Of Impregnating 13-Year-Old Autistic Girl

Liberty, W VA — A 28-year-old man is being held on sexual assault charges after allegedly impregnating a 13-year-old autistic girl he was reportedly “mentoring.”

The victim’s family met Justin Vance through the Special Olympics while he was volunteering. He was helping the family with a couple of projects in their home and needed a place to stay, so they offered him their couch.

In September of last year, police began investigating Vance after receiving a tip that he had sexually assaulted the girl. Vance soon vacated the family’s couch. At that point, the victim’s family said, there was no proof Vance had done anything inappropriate and they had a hard time believing he would harm their child.

Fast forward to January – a visit to the doctor revealed the child was pregnant.

“Let’s just say that he’s in a very safe place now,” the child’s father said. “When I was told that my daughter was pregnant with his child, I had mixed emotions. I was very angry at him, to say the least.”

The child, when interviewed by authorities, claimed she had no idea what being pregnant meant, and had no idea what sex was. When informed that pregnancies couldn’t happen without sex, the child admitted to having had sex with Vance while her parents were asleep.

The victim’s family has decided against abortion.

“That baby’s innocent,” the grandpa-to-be said. “That baby had no control over why it’s here. I can’t punish that baby; I can’t punish my baby for something that this guy did.”

The victim is now residing with a family member and is being home schooled.

Vance has been charged with first-degree sexual assault and has been ordered held on $250,000 bond.

Woman Accused Of Assaulting Husband With Toast And Butter - http://bit.ly/1fCzJxv

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Woman Accused Of Assaulting Husband With Toast And Butter

Cinderford, England — A 45-year-old woman has been accused of assaulting her husband with toast and butter, and for nearly ripping his ear off, in a dispute over chores.

Now, before anyone gets their panties all in a wad and accuses me of mocking domestic violence victims, a disclaimer: Domestic violence is not a laughing matter… the manner in which it is carried out, though, can be quite hilarious. That said…

Julie Evans apparently got a little pissy with the hubby last year and his reported refusal to help out with the chores. As the man lay on the couch one evening, pretending to sleep, Evans doused him water. This had no effect. Evans ended up going to bed that night, still fuming.

The next morning, the woman started an argument. Cause, you know…. women. Authorities claim she threw a piece of toast at her beloved. The man, believing the woman to be quite petty, attempted to leave the room. It was then that Evans reportedly smeared butter on his face. He wiped a bit off of his face and tried to return the favor. Before too long, the two were duking it out on the floor. At some point during the altercation, the man’s ear was damn near ripped off his head.

Evans admitted soaking the man with water, throwing toast at him and smearing butter on his face, but denied the injury to the ear. (An injury that required about 13 stitches and may very well have been the reason behind the couple’s divorce). She is to stand trial on charges of common assault and assault occasioning actual bodily harm in July.

These slow news days really kick my ass…